Top Ten Ways to Raise a Rebel

In our "First Aid for the Family" series, the top ten lists just keep on the coming.  The last two lists were intended to be humorous (though true!) but there's nothing funny about this one.  Taken from the message, "Raising Healthy Kids in a Sick World," here are some sure-fire ways to raise a pagan child.

The entire sermon may be heard at

Top Ten Ways to Raise a Rebel

1) Begin with infancy to give the child everything he wants. In this way he will grow up to believe the world owes him a living.

2) Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children. That way he will learn first-hand how to have a dysfunctional home.

3) When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. This will make him think he’s cute when he sins.

4) Make him go to church but don’t let it affect the way you actually live. That way he will rebel against God but will be so inoculated by religion he won’t know it.

5) Never speak about spiritual things in the home. Wait until he is twenty-one and then “let him decide for himself.”

6) Avoid use of the word, "wrong". He may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.

7) Let him read any printed material, and listen to any music he can get his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feast on garbage.

8) Pick up everything he leaves lying around. Do everything for him so that he will be experienced in throwing all responsibility on others.

9) Take his part against neighbors, teachers, and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.

10) Prepare for a life of grief. You will most likely have one.